What's YOUR Talent?

I've started meditating regularly now after a brief hiatus and as I was sitting in my room ( created from my son's old room) and it dawned on me the real reason I have moved from one project to the next throughout my life, racking up a fine array of jobs, businesses, and other odd/interesting projects.

I was always told I couldn't stick with anything for any period of time.  I was always changing jobs.  Sticking with a job for a year and a half was a long time for me so when I made it to the 3 year mark with The Botanic Garden, everyone patted me on the back for sticking it out.

Well, it wasn't sticking it out actually.  I t was an array of different jobs and projects within one job position.  When I can create new projects on a regular basis, I can stick around forever!  And that is my talent.  Creating.

My husband is a poet.  My eldest son is a creative musical genius (sorry, I'm a proud mom) and my younger son is a film and music producer in the making.  Oh, and they both can write some pretty darn good poetry.

While I can say that I have now picked up the pen on a regular basis after catching the writers bug, it wasn't always that way.  I barely read as a kid (wait - I knew how to read....I just didn't). I listened to a lot of music and played in various bands and did some acting.  I certainly didn't write much of anything except lyrics to go with the music I wrote.  What I do is come up with some pretty large ideas (often) (no, wait - very often) and eventually manifest them.

That's what I do.  I create businesses, events, large endeavors like last year's art project with Dominican University's design and merchandising program for Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  The fun is definitely in the creation.  And when it is created and no more can be done with the idea, it's time to move on to the next idea.  (They usually are stacked up, one after another!)  There is never a shortage of ideas.  And if I am in top form, rested, my brain can spit ideas out at top speed!

So that is why I have never lasted very long in one position.  And I am okay with that.  Do I get bored?  Well, yeah, probably.  When most people are revelling in their successes, my brain is already onto the next project.  The fun was in the creation.  I'm happy to leave the revelling to others.

But like I've been saying, I've learned to sit with an idea after it is birthed, let it grow on it's own with some fertilization now and then.  As a gardener, we know that there is that time period after the seed has been planted in the soil.  Nothing is happening on the surface; nothing is required except watering once the seed is planted.  That germination process that happens in the dark is the amazing thing about seeds.  They have everything they need to sprout within their little seed bodies.  And some will sprout while others won't.  That is something we, as gardeners, have no control of.

So once an idea is "planted", it needs to be left to its own devices to sprout on its own.  The great thing, though, about ideas, versus seeds, is that you have no idea what will sprout. It will always resemble the original idea in some form, but as it grows, it has its own life.  So I've learned to let these ideas form with little input from me.  And it's amazing what happens.  It's that liminal stage of betwixt and between one stage and the next.  The excitement is in not knowing exactly what will happen.

I took a stand up comedy class two years ago, with the idea of telling funny stories as opposed to jokes.  I was told this was not real stand up.  But my idea was planted.  And this year, four of us created a kind of prose/poetry theatrical performance piece.  And it is growing still.

So, when someone asks what my talents are, I will forgo the typical musician, singer, horticulturist labels of the past and proudly exclaim, "I create!"  And then move on to the next project........

Funny Times Ahead!

So four of us have decided to create a performance group, kind of a spoken word type of group. And word has it we will take it to the streets, so to speak, and do live performances. I really don't have an issue with this as I have performed most of my life, some in ways I would like NOT to remember!

What is interesting is there are four views on each topic. We all put ideas in a hat and have chosen (from that hat), which topics we will address. One word - four voices. And in a way, we have begun learning about one another. It seems that my life is a tragic one, full of bad mothers and abusive fathers. While I can laugh at all the "tragedies" now, it wasn't always that way. I survived, have lived to tell the next tale, and have made lemonade out of the lemons that were tossed into my cook pot.

It has also made me think about how those stories created themselves and more so, about those that affected them. Yes, we can all say we had terrible upbringings, full of dysfunction and drama. But if you look deeply at the people whom you'd like to blame for that dysfunction, you will also see the sadness and tragedy that formed their lives and souls.

Of course, there are some people who are just evil and brought to this earth to mess up those closest and dearest to them. I lived with one. But can I be so cliche to say that she helped make me the person I am now, more soulful, more compassionate of those closest to me? I think I can. So I can say a thank you now. The difficulties have passed. I can laugh at them. I can also cry at them still. And they continue to shape my ever changing being.

Stir Krazee these days!

I got the chance last night to introduce two comics at Molly Malone's in Forest Park as part of an event that didn't quite go as planned on Madison Street. The whole idea of Stir Krazee came out of my comedy class with Cameron Esposito from Lincoln Lodge. I took the class last fall and unfortunately I didn't graduate becasue life's stressors at work and home got too great and adding one more stressor of writing a comedy sketch for graduation and then performing it made me one anxious person. Not that I back away from any task because it is too great. I have come to the realization that I CAN say no, not right now, thank you, and come back to it at a later date when life allows it. And I want to enjoy comedy when I do it and not feel stressed about it. I have done every other type of performance - theatre, live music, poetry, and now I wanted to try my hand at stand up comedy. Not getting off track, I invited my teacher to perform last night. I told her I would probably have to introduce her and she told me it would be good to get experience on a microphone! Ha! I spend most of my days "on stage", "performing". I did get the chance to loosen up a bit more during the introduction and "yuck it up" a bit. It made me feel a bit better about doing stand up comedy. I continue to write sketches and I know that when the time is right, I will take that new path onto a different stage. And love it... And then....who knows what will come next. Aging is a pretty cool thing these days. Yes, I am stir krazee in that I want to do so many things yet in my many years on this earthly plain. Call me "krazee". Go ahead. I'll just write a comedy sketch about you.

Comedy Tonite!

So I started my women's standup comedy class last nite. Eight women and one teacher. And I learned how to write my first joke. Do I think I'm funny? Well, my friends and family tell me so. I tend to be the prankster, the jokester of the group, the one who is willing to make fun of herself to get a laugh.

I thought about it after class as to how one becomes the class clown, the family comedienne. In my family, I now believe I used it to lessen the darkness that hung over the house. Or maybe it was to decrease the consequences of a punishment. Kind of like, divert the attention to a joke and I might not get in trouble. Or maybe it is used just to get attention.

I was told a long time ago (by a therapist) that people become therapists in order to understand their own dysfunctional families. It that the same with comedians? Laugh your way through the hard times?

All I know is that I have a lifetime of stories to now turn into comic sketches! That is sure to make the rest of my family a bit nervous! So here's to dysfunction! And all the fodder it creates! Let's see how it all fits into the rest of this class. I'm thinking corsets and comedy......