Manifesting the Monkey Mind!

I re-read an older blog entry today.  It is good to go back and re-read your journals, notes, etc.  Each time they give another insight.  It was about manifesting.  And the first quote was
"All we are is a result of what we have thought." Buddha

And I thought about that a bit.  And I thought about all of the seeds, dreams, wishes I have made in the past few years to see where they all are today.  Manifesting.  What really is it?  Does it really happen?  I have had these thoughts lately, been questioning a whole bunch.  Where am I, am I where I want to be, am I close to what I wanted....  You have to re-assess at different points in your life.

I feel I am at another crossroads....again.... Sometimes it seems as if I will never be satisfied.  Or maybe, it is because I need to learn constantly.  I am always eager to learn something new.  And I put my all into learning that "thing".  Then, once learned, it's time to move onto the next learning experience.  That mode of learning has put me in new situations more often than I can remember.

I have changed careers 3 times in the last 25 years.  I guess in the big scheme of things, that isn't a lot. But each has been an extreme of the next one!  And each has given me such experiences, such knowledge.  Yes, I have been able to manifest each one of these changes.  They did not goes as originally planned, but hey, that's how it goes.  Those seeds/dreams/ideas have a life of their own once planted.

Problem is there are these seeds growing and none have presented themselves as forerunners in my life at the moment.  Nothing seems that urgent right now.  Here is a portion of what I wrote over a year ago.


Your life is a physical manifestation of the thoughts in your head. An affirmative thought is 100 times more powerful than a negative thought. Whatever you are thinking and feeling today is creating your future. Your thoughts and feelings create your life. When you think of it in this way, your future depends upon positive thoughts! We can change our path through a shift in our awareness.


Okay.  If my life is a physical manifestation of the thoughts in my head, then no wonder why I feel I am going crazy.  There is no more room in my brain and each of these thoughts are living their own lives and dreaming their own dreams right now as we speak.  A phrase they use nowadays is "monkey brain", a constant chatter.  Something advanced meditation folk have learned to tame.  My monkeys are running wild, totally out of control!  I really wish one of those thoughts I thought about would take the lead so the others would quiet themselves for a while!
There were 5 different concepts/questions regarding manifesting:
1. ASK! The universe responds to your thoughts and wishes.


2. BELIEVE! If you believe that it is yours already, and show unwavering faith, you will attract the way for that wish to get to you; the path will appear!

3. DOUBT- If you doubt, this will lead to disappointment as what you desire will not come to you. Replace doubt with unwavering faith!


4. RECEIVE - FEEL the way you will feel once what you desire arrives. Put yourself into the frequency of what you're wanting. What would you feel like if you had it right now. Feel that.

5. ACT - When intuitive feeling is present, ACT ON IT! Visualizing what you want will help to materialize it. Dwell only upon the end results. FEEL the end result. The universe will figure out how it will manifest. All YOU have to do is feel it as already here.

Okay then.  I am ASKING that my gods, goddesses, angels, protectors and everyone else out there BELIEVE that my monkey brain is getting the best of me and I DOUBT whether I will make it through another sleepless night so I am hoping to RECEIVE some of your positive energy so that I may ACT on just one of the many ideas screaming in my head!  Oh, and did I say pretty please!!!!

p.s.  I actually DID make some requests today of these beings and made some plans and then a few new paths opened up just today.  Pretty amazing how this works, eh?  Now, if I can only wrangle the monkeys tonight so I can get a good nights sleep.......

Letting Go, Part 2

To “let go” is to fear less and love more.

Age 50 was a difficult one. 40 didn't do anything to my psyche. But 50 has been a very weird year. Very transitional as well. A new thought process has taken place. What once mattered no longer does. And the worst part is letting go of old thought patterns, dreams way past their prime and relationships that have outlived their usefulness and can't walk with me into the new place that is being forged as I write this. That is the saddest thing to understand. Dreams can be fleeting and can be replaced by new dreams, or refashioned into new versions. But relationships cannot perform in the same way. People don't change, at least not their basic traits and values. I look at people who have been in my life for a very long time who just don't fit anymore. It is sad because as much as I don’t want to let them go, I have no choice. We have no control in our lives anyway, as much as we think we do. And the more we try to control our lives, the more out of control we become.

Then I think of the adage, "Let someone go, if they come back to you it was meant to be". My fear is that they come back and I'm not interested. I read that letting go of someone or something feels like your skin has been removed and you spend a deal of time with it raw and exposed before it starts to heal up again. Letting go of something that has past its expiration date does two things. It opens you up t all sorts of new possibilities. That “thing” was taking up too much space and energy and nothing else could grow. Kind of like thinning out the forest so the new saplings can have light and room to grow. But it does another thing too.

Letting go forces you to look at what you are leaving behind with microscopic eyes. You see all of the flaws that were not visible earlier on. And a great deal of those flaws are your own. It hurts badly. I’ll be the first to admit it. It gives you the opportunity to live with those flaws, change them, let them work out their own issues without intrusions of your views and ideas, and last but not lease, work through the pain. There is always (at least in my world) the question of what I could have done differently to not have to be in this letting go place. Can’t help it – it is an ingrained, learned trait that I will fight with till the end. It also gives me the opportunity to lessen that trait a bit and let myself know that this is a normal pattern of life.

Things, people, change. Nothing is static. Someone told me that relationships are like a figure eight pattern. When you are in a relationship and everything is working fine, you are intersecting at the same place. Then over time or circumstances, one moves faster or slower and you aren’t intersecting at the same place anymore. Then you are out of sync. The question is if you will get in sync again or are permanently on a different course. The more you try to make something happen, the further away you get from it. Same with a dream. I have a dream of what I’d like to see happen but I’ve learned painfully that I must let it find its path (with a small amount of help on my part) and give it the freedom to change and grow. Just like a child, it wants its own freedom to explore.

Life changes course on a regular basis. Who am I to fight where it wants to go? I can put my wishes out in the collective conscious and sit back and wait to see what happens. The more I try to control or fight it, the further away it gets from me. All I can do is let it all go, plant the seeds and see what happens.

So I will try to fear less and love more, love myself more especially. To know that I am on the right path, whichever one it is, and to love where I am, accept the things I cannot change, and cherish the wisdom that comes from the pain as well as joy. For without the pain of change and letting go, one cannot know the joy of what is yet to be.

eden

Baubo's Garden