“Today is a good
day,” you once said, because the nausea had subsided and the trips to the
bathroom had decreased to a single digit.
Today is a good day, for me, as I get to see you, sitting in bed,
smaller than the last time but certainly not diminished.
You sit there,
head covered by a bright purple cap you chose from the hospital’s cap bin,
eating tiny bits of meat loaf and mashed potatoes, careful not to block your
compromised airway; and you are glowing.
I wanted to tell
you that purple is the color of royalty, expanded awareness and high spiritual
attainment. It is the color of the
highest chakra, which connects us to the universe, to enlightenment. It is said if you surround yourself
with purple you will have peace of mind. This is how you looked today. But I didn’t tell you.
Only a few days
earlier you struggled for the precious air that escapes you now. But today you are glowing. I sit next to you as you listen to the
plans being made to take you home for the last time.
I am honored to
have been at your side for very difficult news from your team, and I am again
honored to sit with you and add my meager voice to your most precious hospice
plans. I find myself annoyed by
what feels like tiny flies nipping at my arms as I try to listen, and I swat at
them, trying to brush them away only to find that there are no flies or any
insects for that matter in this intensive care room. Of course there aren’t! And no one else seems bothered by these pests either.
And then it
becomes apparent to me. Angels. They are announcing themselves. Of course. They are gathering.
A few of them colored you in peace today and cleared your throat so you
could feed your failing body and speak the many words you still have to say.
Today is a good
day. I am meeting your
angels. They have let me know that
they know that I know.
Do you hear them
too, my brave friend? You
must. Your fear is gone, you tell
me; and the pain has left your face.
You want to play cards, not talk of death. You want to cram in as many stories from friends as your
ears will allow. You told me once
that you knew that God is taking care of you. Can you hear him now between the angels’ banter and laughing?
I want to hear
you. I want to hear the truths
that are coming to you now.
I know you are tired but this student is eager to hear the wisdom that
this journey has taught you.
I’ve been seeing
dragonflies everywhere lately: symbols of
transformation and life's ever-constant process of change, of leaving the old
body to become a new, lighter creature inhabiting a different realm. To some they are fairies. To others,
they are the souls of those who have gone before us. Angels!
The lessons
you’ve learned, the gifts of yourself you so wanted to share with those you
love have come in the form of angelic beings. No gift has ever been lovelier.
Today is a good
day filled with dragonflies, fairies and other celestial wonders. As you have said, we will play
again in the world beyond. I
believe that. Until that time, I
will revel in the beauty and magic of butterflies and dragonflies and think of
you, sweet angel.
Posts
