Saturday, October 24, 2009
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Monday, October 5, 2009
To “let go” is to fear less and love more.
Age 50 was a difficult one. 40 didn't do anything to my psyche. But 50 has been a very weird year. Very transitional as well. A new thought process has taken place. What once mattered no longer does. And the worst part is letting go of old thought patterns, dreams way past their prime and relationships that have outlived their usefulness and can't walk with me into the new place that is being forged as I write this. That is the saddest thing to understand. Dreams can be fleeting and can be replaced by new dreams, or refashioned into new versions. But relationships cannot perform in the same way. People don't change, at least not their basic traits and values. I look at people who have been in my life for a very long time who just don't fit anymore. It is sad because as much as I don’t want to let them go, I have no choice. We have no control in our lives anyway, as much as we think we do. And the more we try to control our lives, the more out of control we become.
Then I think of the adage, "Let someone go, if they come back to you it was meant to be". My fear is that they come back and I'm not interested. I read that letting go of someone or something feels like your skin has been removed and you spend a deal of time with it raw and exposed before it starts to heal up again. Letting go of something that has past its expiration date does two things. It opens you up t all sorts of new possibilities. That “thing” was taking up too much space and energy and nothing else could grow. Kind of like thinning out the forest so the new saplings can have light and room to grow. But it does another thing too.
Letting go forces you to look at what you are leaving behind with microscopic eyes. You see all of the flaws that were not visible earlier on. And a great deal of those flaws are your own. It hurts badly. I’ll be the first to admit it. It gives you the opportunity to live with those flaws, change them, let them work out their own issues without intrusions of your views and ideas, and last but not lease, work through the pain. There is always (at least in my world) the question of what I could have done differently to not have to be in this letting go place. Can’t help it – it is an ingrained, learned trait that I will fight with till the end. It also gives me the opportunity to lessen that trait a bit and let myself know that this is a normal pattern of life.
Things, people, change. Nothing is static. Someone told me that relationships are like a figure eight pattern. When you are in a relationship and everything is working fine, you are intersecting at the same place. Then over time or circumstances, one moves faster or slower and you aren’t intersecting at the same place anymore. Then you are out of sync. The question is if you will get in sync again or are permanently on a different course. The more you try to make something happen, the further away you get from it. Same with a dream. I have a dream of what I’d like to see happen but I’ve learned painfully that I must let it find its path (with a small amount of help on my part) and give it the freedom to change and grow. Just like a child, it wants its own freedom to explore.
Life changes course on a regular basis. Who am I to fight where it wants to go? I can put my wishes out in the collective conscious and sit back and wait to see what happens. The more I try to control or fight it, the further away it gets from me. All I can do is let it all go, plant the seeds and see what happens.
So I will try to fear less and love more, love myself more especially. To know that I am on the right path, whichever one it is, and to love where I am, accept the things I cannot change, and cherish the wisdom that comes from the pain as well as joy. For without the pain of change and letting go, one cannot know the joy of what is yet to be.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
To “let go” is not to cut myself off, it’s the realization I can’t control another.
To “let go” is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.
To “let go” is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To “let go” is not to try to change or blame another; it’s to make the most of myself.
To “let go” is not to care for, but to care about.
To “let go” is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To “let go” is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
To “let go” is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies.
To “let go” is not to be protective; it’s to permit another to face reality.
To “let go” is not to deny, but to accept.
To “let go” is not to nag, scold or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
To “let go” is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes, and cherish myself in it.
To “let go” is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
To “let go” is to fear less and love more.
warmest regards, eden
Well, not quite the statement for what continues to happen but apropos nonetheless. Remember that movie? Field of Dreams? Ray says, "It's okay, honey. I... I was just talking to the cornfield." Annie replies, "Hey, what if the Voice calls while you're gone?" And Ray responds, "Take a message."
Yeah, when you hear something like that, you think you're listening to, 1. the movie "Field of Dreams", 2. a comedian on Comedy Central, or 3. Voices in your head and you must be schizophrenic. I keep telling everyone that when you put your thoughts, questions, ideas out in the collective consciousness, they DO get picked up and if you are conscious yourself, you will get answers. It keeps happening. I was having dinner with Peggy last night and I told her about my angel that came into the store last week. We also talked about a mutual friend, Diana, who is going to instruct a women's healing class at the store. I said I have to get on that and call her to set up the dates.
Well, who walks into the store this morning? Yes, she did. And we set up the healing class for October. I believe that answers to your prayers or however you ask the universe to help you, are answered. But only if you are ready to hear them. Or open to hear them. I know that in the past, there was way too much noise in my life to hear, recognize, and see any help that was calling out to me. I also was not ready. Remember? When you are ready, the teacher appears?
So, I know that there are angels in the outfield in my field of dreams. They are there to help me, answer my questions, and guide me. Watch for them in your lives. They come packaged in all shapes and forms, from an 82 year young retired woman to a small child who says just the right thing. Play ball!