Meditation Prayer

I was meditating this morning as I try to do each and every morning before work, and found it turned into prayer instead of quiet meditation. Monkey mind is always with me during these sessions, even more so these days. Lately it is really hard to quiet and calm my mind. Chanting helps. Mind you I always move from meditation to another position where I Do pray and ask for guidance and healing.

But this morning nothing was working and I found myself praying only. I pray to all powers - Gods, Goddesses, Angels, you name it. Broaden the base so to speak for more coverage? So I didn't fight it and I prayed. I prayed for a quiet mind (!); I prayed for my business: I prayed for my husband to find peace these days in his hectic and overwhelming job; I prayed for my older son, the musician (quite talented), to find his success and happiness; and I prayed for my own peace of mind.

This liminal phase I am in is quite frustrating. I feel all mushy and not quite cooked for the next phase. And I never give myself time for these transitions. Like Veruka Salt, "I want it NOW!"

I also need a vacation desperately and luckily and finally am soon to get it! Yeah!

According to the website Meditation Truth,
            in some traditions the words prayer and meditation are
            used interchangeably.There are Buddhist and Catholic
            and Hindu and Jewish meditation practices that involve
            repeating or focusing on or contemplating some religious
            passage or idea.

According to Brother Aleksei (www.brother-aleksei.org),
            when you choose to combine prayer and meditation, that
            is to take a specific request into the space of your
            communion with God, always begin with
            acknowledging and affirming the Presence.
(Okay, so my presence includes EVERYONE – angels, goddesses, etc.)
          Then make a conscious interior movement in your heart to
           surrender your will and meditate on your request. Meditate
          from a feeling as if your request has been already granted
           while immersing your heart in a deep emotion of gratitude and
           love. Your request will immediately begin to take form. It may
          take some time before you can see the result, but have faith
          that it is gestating, just like a seed you plant into a fertile soil.
          Cultivate it, protect it from any doubts and fears.
(I have done this. I HAVE planted seeds. Good to know I am on the right path! I like this next one…)
           Do not dig up the seed to check if it has sprouted yet.

If I continue to meditate and believe in the prayer (seed), the seed will sprout, maybe not in the way you originally though because, remember, it has a life of its own now.

So, I guess I am okay with this morning’s prayer meditation. I was always told to quiet the mind when meditating, clear the mind of thoughts, ideas, let them go when they pop in (monkey mind!). But it is also okay for the meditation to be something else. Who am I to fight it? Let it be what it wants to be. Let go of all expectations and “it” will happen.

Divine Fate? Angels in my Midst?

So a short time ago, I wanted to attend Omega Institutes Women's Conference at the end of September. And when I went to sign up, it was full and reservations were closed. And there was a contest to win tickets to the conference.

I entered the conference, posted my entry.....and didn't win. I figured if I was meant to go, I would win the contest. So the contest deadline came and went and no word. So I wasn't meant to go. Ok, I get that. I am okay with that. I guess. There is always next year.

A few weeks back I just decided to look at the website again and just tease and torture myself (because that is just what I like to do.....), check out who was speaking and so on. I also decided to see if I could register (torturing myself further) because we all need to get shot down twice, right?

To my extreme surprise, the site let me register. I couldn't believe it! I didn't believe it! Why would I? These things don't happen to me!

Or do they?

So I decided it was a mistake, a glitch in their site software. And I didn't buy an airline ticket. I said if they confirm my registration, only then will I buy a ticket. A few days passed, nothing. Then on the fourth day of waiting, it was confirmed! And I bought my airfare.

So I am going! I guess I WAS meant to go to this! Wow, can't wait. A powerful weekend awaits me. What else can I expect that I wouldn't normally expect? Are there angels in my midst? There have been before. I will call them in again. (I really DID pray to every power I know for help!) And wait in wonder for the magic to happen.

Compassionate and Unique Leadership Skills

"When you act from the highest, you will not only feel the delight of such a connection but others will be uplifted in your presence and get a hint of their own Divine Light." I procrastinated AGAIN and missed out on an important opportunity and I am angry at myself about it. I wanted to attend the Women's Conference 2010 at Omega Institute this fall and I put off signing up for it till today. And it is sold out. Bummer. Big bummer. BUT, there is an opportunity to win tickets to it by answering the question, "What unique qualities empower you, as a woman, to be a strong and compassionate leader?" Wow, big question. And it has to be answered in 200 words or less. I started reading some of the answers and was overwhelmed by the creativity and profundity. I've written things on that topic in more ways than one so I decided to go back and look at some of the words I have written. And if I pray and ask the universe for help, maybe, just maybe I will be the winner. A friend was just given free tickets to go back to Medjugorje in Bosnia, where she was healed. She felt a need to go back and could not afford to go, so she prayed. And she received! I DO believe that the universe is waiting to help if we just ask. "Ask and you shall receive." So I am because I feel deep down that it is important that I go this year. Here is my answer to that question in 247 words. Hopefully they aren't counting. Unique qualities for compassionate leadership are really quite simple. Believe in your dreams. Ask for help and receive. Face your biggest fears. Take risks that you know will lead to greater things. Trust and empower the people around you; trust in yourself and your abilities; trust your gut; trust that moving forward includes hurts, failure, darkness, as well as growth and achievement; trust that NOTHING is static, NOTHING ever goes as initially planned; trust that not knowing everything at all times is OK; life is unfolding as it is meant to. Let go of all preconceived notions - they will hold you back; let go of limiting behaviors; to "let go" is to fear less and love more. Accept yours and others flaws, intricacies, gifts, beauty; accept that you have no control over the universe and it will guide you. Become to others the same role model that moved you to greater things. Impart the wisdom you've learned to others moving along those same paths you once travelled, helping them to reach the level of inner comfort and outer freedom you yourself have found. If we envision a world where women support each other and help each other find their place in an ever-changing world, then we can become the change we want to see.